Thank you gift

I'll keep this short.  I hope that you and yours have a healthy and Happy Thanksgiving.  That said, unlike Christmas/Hanukkah, there aren't gifts...yet.  I'm sure that as Black Friday/Thursday (soon to be Wednesday) and Cyber Monday/Sunday (soon to be June 11) creep further and further from the holiday, we'll be encouraged by retailers to just give a little something in honor of the TG holiday.  And, what better gift than something food related?  So, without further ado, here are some food-related gifts that you should be bringing with you tomorrow when you gorge on meats and carbs:

First, there's Bacon Scented Underwear.  This is obviously a gift for trained professionals.  This isn't a gift given lightly, or to someone who you don't readily know.  While it's made in two cuts, one for men and one for women, I can't get behind anything that makes a lady's nether region smell like meat.  However, there's definitely going to be that dude out there who digs that, so what do I know.  Frankly, due to our natural digestive processes and tendency for gluttony this Holiday, it's likely to be a menagerie of smells down there to begin with.  Unless this product can promise that all others will be replaced with the pleasant odor of bacon...you may want to pass on these.

https://baconsalt.3dcartstores.com/Bacon-Scented-Underwear-Pillowcases_c_112.html

More meat-related gifts?  OK.  What do you get for the BBQ chef who has everything?  Why, a personalized steak branding iron, of course!  The folks over at Texas Irons have an array of brands with catchy phrases on them, or you can go for the personalized monogrammed irons for those times when you need to claim your meat prior to it being served.  "Hands off, asshole, that's my steak, and I know because, yes, it does have my name on it."

http://texasirons.com/prod_bitemebbqbrandingiron.cfm?gclid=Cj0KEQiA1dWyBRDqiJye6LjkhfIBEiQAw06ITjad0neyDgOGR1Whve-Z4X5coccd_SiZwEUd4ydEqhAaAnl18P8HAQ

Finally, you can't be expected to eat Grandma's fresh-made apple pie without the "a la mode" component.  But, frequently, the ice cream freshly taken out of the freezer makes those first couple of scoops neigh impossible.  Enter the ScoopTHAT! ice cream scoop.  Yeah, it looks like an ordinary scoop, but, armed with a patent-pending heating system that transfers your natural body heat into the scoop cup itself, you're literally heating the blade edge of the cup, melting the ice cream as you effortlessly serve it up to cap an otherwise fantastic meal with the fam. 

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00KGWNOFU/?tag=frepixboa-20

That's it.  And, while it's too late to order this crap before tomorrow, plan ahead for next year, when the retail industry will be having their Christmas specials on Labor Day!